The institution of marriage, as ordained by God is supposed to be the foundation for the evolution of better societies.
And the very foundation for a successful marriage is respect.
Your spouse is supposed to help you fulfill the God-ordained purpose of your life.
Our creator knows that we cannot do it alone; that is why he wants man and woman to be a pair: a unity of diverse qualities, forming one formidable force for success and achievement.
To me, marriage is a decision. You do not hope for something in marriage but you decide.
In what way? When you see some couple how well they relate and loves each other and you are talking to yourself that you hope you marry such a person like that who cares and loves so much.
It is left to you how you want your marriage to be not hoping. Therefore, do not hope but decide on your marriage.
Your choice of a marriage partner is probably the biggest decision you will ever have to make in your life.
Choosing whom to marry based on romantic feelings alone, is often misleading.
Marriage is no hide-and-seek game. It requires effort and diligence, rather than indulging in emotions that may change with the weather.
WHAT IS MARRIAGE?
Marriage is a life contract with my own understanding. It is a union of two or more persons creating a family tie and carrying legal, social, religious rights and responsibilities.
Marriage is not for babies but for matured people grown spiritually, financially, physically, emotionally, morally and socially. Never rush into marriage so as not to rush out. You enter marriage for the sake of love.
A successful marriage depends on your choice of partner.
Many mismatched marriages did not make it to the first anniversary because they were based on raw desire and lust that had been confused with love.
Marriage has been defined as the covenantal commitment of two people to each other’s total welfare.
One mentor described marriage as “a sanctified friendship”. What matters most in the daily lives of a husband and wife is the quality of their friendship.
In marriage, get this right below;
DISCOVER YOUR PURPOSE: It will give you the choice of who to marry. Two people entering marriage must have similar purposes. Both of you must be compatible with purpose.
It cannot be the will of God if both of you do not have the same purpose. If you are not convenient in the relationship with your partner after seeking counsels, just quit.
It is far better than having a marriage where you will be struggling to cope as a pastor’s wife as an example.
CLEANLINESS: They say and I quote “Cleanliness is next to godliness”. Learn to look good too and match clothes for different events.
Clean with nice body smell; add a glow to your holiness. Learn how to dress your age.
Let your dressing be simple, neat, smart and cover your body appropriately because you will be addressed in the way you are dressed.
DON’T BE IN HASTE GETTING MARRIED
Time always reveals true motives. Here are some reasons why you have to take your time…
- Taking time to build a relationship. One cannot build a lasting relationship in haste, regardless of your conviction that the other person is your life partner.
- If one is not matured enough to wait, it is a sign of immaturity which is called IMPATIENCE. One is probably not matured enough to marry yet. Getting married in such circumstances can lead to divorce.
- Waiting prayerfully will reveal a person’s motives and bring to light true character. Remember the word said, “Trust God, But Test People”. (TGBTP).
- Apart from character, we need to know a person’s strengths and weaknesses.
- Taking time to check your spouse-to-be characters, values, goals, convictions, and personality. Also, if you have not found a good person who does good things, then you have not found God’s will. God’s will is the best when getting married.
- Spend quality time together with each other before getting married.
MATURITY LEVELS BEFORE MARRIAGE
The covenant relationship between a matured man and woman in which they both seek and receive is called a MARRIAGE.
Marriage is not for boys and girls, not a man and a man nor a woman and a woman. It is simply the mutual agreement relationship that was ordained by God Almighty.
Before going into marriage, check these;
- Spiritual Maturity: Serve God; a good marriage is a salary paid by God as a single man and woman.
- Emotional Maturity: Marriage is not a bed of roses. Be emotional stable, most especially men.
- Financial Maturity: Particularly for the men. After every wedding comes to marriage. Youths, stop waiting for governments to give you work, you need more than one stream of a source of income. You should not wait to have all the money in your bank account but try doing something with your hands. Ladies, be empowered.
- Physically Matured
- Mentally Matured